To the Salesman....

Ya'll know I'm in retail and sold $50,000 in Cutco knives during college. Let me reiterate a popular belief of sales people, "People don't like to be sold, but they love to buy!" And you Kevin, are trying too hard to sell yourself! Obviously I'm not the ultimate guru of people interaction or I wouldn't be on a dating website myself, but I felt like saying, "dude, take a breath!" as I read the following message:

Hello my name is Kevin I'm 39 6'5 265 I grew up in Peoria but currently live in Goodyear I own homes in Waddell and surprise also but they are rentals I own destiny tattoo and as well a monster truck limo business .and weight gym or fitness center ...chivalry is not dead and very much my normal nature,..I'm emotionally and financially secure mostly at this age drama free and would love to talk more if I semi interest u call or txt me 602 303-4XXX u look like a positive person w great energy,.... I am a college grad w degree in psychology ,.. Very patient and very peaceful anyhow have a blessed day hope to hear from you,..u have incredibly gorgeous eyes,... Phone giving me issues if u can't get thru send message in here,...

Does anyone else feel like someone just vomited thoughts on their screen? I mean, wow, he brings up great attributes, but for someone with a 31% enemy rating I'm a little skeptical. And it feels like he's trying too hard, or spewing too many of those catch phrases people think women want to hear. Like those people at the lotion kiosks in the mall that fast talk all the great attributes of their product as you walk by and it makes you want to walk even faster? Even Cupid says "Ya'll Got Issues" instead of the normal "The Two of Us" question comparison....  The honest truth is I'm not into tattoos that cover both a person's entire arms and their neck (which is probably part of why I won't be investigating this further), but the even deeper truth is when someone tries to sell me on something, I pull back. I like to get intrigued and explore more because you said something interesting, not because you just tried to sell me using everything in your arsenal of pretty words. 

Because I feel like it could have been genuine, I did send a message back. I figure take it with a grain of salt, and if something about my thoughts ring true for him and helps him find love faster, then great! This is what I wrote:

"Thank you for your message Kevin. While you seem genuine and possess several really great qualities, I'd like to be perfectly honest with you and hope that it's taken as well meaning as it's intended. Your message had a lot of content in it. And by that I mean it feels like you're trying to sell yourself too hard. You know the kiosk people at the mall? The ones that make you walk faster cause you can feel that they're just trying to sell you on something? Someone recently told me to "try softly" and I think there's a lot of power in that statement. Best wishes in finding love!"

What is comes down to is thank you sir for the information, but I think I'll keep on shopping!

Update: 

He responded back with:

Not at all if you were that perceptive you'd see I had no profile and if I hadn't told you the basics you'd be skeptical yet it was courtesy as for I'm very private and not the buffet type where is allow women to buffet what ever looks tasty,... Lol so let me know and have a blessed night

This is me being mean, but dude, stop vomiting thoughts onto my screen. Pause. Take breaths, and what am I supposed to let you know about? I think at this point we're pretty sure we don't like each other? Now, where is the store directory? Mama needs a new pair of boots....